Sarcasm and reincarnation : Genin's againevil cackle
by Stormshadow7
Summary: Naruto is tired of living after the fourth shinobi war, so Kyuubi and Shinigami come to an agreement that he can have two loved ones but they will be sealed within him. Will be Minato/ FemKyuubi , Kaen/ undecided and Naruto/ undecided
1. Chapter 1

Naruto sighed as he walked through the destroyed streets of Konoha after the Fourth shinobi war. 'All of them..Gone. Kakashi, Shikamaru, Sakura' Naruto collapsed depressed onto the ground next to the memorial stone and cried. [Oh Kit.] Kyuubi tried to comfort her host, to no avail.

When he finally fell asleep Naruto found himself in his mindscape where he was hugged by the now human Kyuubi no Kitsune. ~ Kyuubi. I .. ~ Naruto tried to say but couldn't seem to go on.

[ Hush child. I understand what you are trying to say. You feel so lost that you cannot continue to live. Is that right?] the demononic fox / woman asked quietly. Nodding painfully Naruto buried his head into her chest and cried. [Oh Kit. Hush child, it's alright. ] the Kitsune comforted her host until he fell asleep, then called out [ Shinigami?]

In response, a man standing at 6'1 with a pitch black cloak and scythe walked out of the shadows. $ Kyuubi. What can I do for you?$ he asked with a slight hiss. [My kit, is feeling depressed after failing to protect Konoha and those he saw as family. I was wondering if it was possible for you to give him back his father and Kakashi from this time period?] Kyuubi asked slyly.

Narrowing his black eyes the death god studied the fox demoness and said softly $ The only way for me to do such a thing would be if you were to use the timetravel Jutsu that a Biju is capable of.$ Grinning madly Kyuubi cackled and said [ I know. And I plan on using it!] Sighing, Shinigami nodded in consent $ Very well, he may have his father and brother from this time period. But they will be sealed in with you. The first reason is because he is not supposed to have a father when he is a Genin - and that is where you will go, to the Genin exam day. The second reason is that there cannot be two Kakashi's in the same time period. $

With these words the death god disappeared and Kyuubi channeled chakra into Naruto causing him to be thrown back to the morning of his Genin exam.

Genin Exam:

Naruto woke slowly, groaning as he fell onto the floor with a 'Thunk'. Hearing mental laughter, he snarled ~ Shut it, Kyuubi.~ as he went for his ramen. Halfway through an instant cup, the former Rokudaime swore and grabbing his gear, dove for the door.

On the way to school, the Jinchuuriki lazily kept his senses open and said mentally ~ Ok, Kyuubi. Explain how I am now twelve years of age again, have everyone hating me and am supposedly going for my third Genin exam. Please. Also, why do I now have two more consciousnesses in my head?~

Nervous, now because of his temper Kyuubi gulped and said [ Um.. Well, first of all after you broke down in your mindscape I decided that you deserved a second chance. I contacted Shingami who allowed you to have your father and future Kakashi sealed with me. To have this done though, I had to use a time travel Jutsu that only Biju can do. Ok?]

Shocked, Naruto didn't reply and just walked into his classroom to do his test. Finally after three names he asked ~ Dad? Kakashi?~ In reply he recieved two mental hugs and the words *We'll talk later, kit* from his Minato. Smiling , Naruto stepped up and waited for his instructions.

"Ok, Naruto. I want you to do a henge, a kawarimi and a Bunshin." Iruka - Sensei told the twelve year old. Nodding in determination, Naruto decided to do the same thing as last time- except use a Kage Bunshin for the Bunshin. Successfully doing the henge ; then doing a kawarimi out of Iruka's way, he placed his hands together in the classic ram seal and shouted " Kage Bunshin no Jutsu."

Ignoring the classes reaction , Naruto turned with his clones and said earily in sinc with them " So do I pass, Sensei?" Gaping, Iruka nodded and handed him a headband, still shocked that the twelve year old could do that.

Finally after five minutes the man said " Ok kids, go have lunch then when you come back I will teams the list of who is on which team. "

==================break================================

During lunch Naruto decided to get away from everyone and vanished into the forest behind the school. Once there he sat down and closing his eyes appeared in his mindscape. ~Kyuubi?~ the twelve year old called as he walked slowly through the halls of what looked like a house, but he couldn't be sure.

[Naruto?] the fox transformed into jeer human form and caught the flying blond. [oh, kit. What's wrong?] Shaking Naruto swallowed and softly told her what his issue was. [oh Naruto. I'm so sorry. ] the demon hugged the boy harder and shook her head as the other two walked into the room.

/Naruto?/ Kakashi asked quietly, as he put an arm around the boy's shoulders. Shaking his head, the boy vanished from his mind leaving the three puzzled. [ We must speak with him soon. And Kakashi, we must come up with a new name for you. ] Kyuubi spoke softly. *Hmm. He's more afraid of losing us. Then he is of us. And I already have a name for Kakashi. Its Kaen, it still uses the K but wont get you confused with this time period's Kakashi.* Thinking it over the other two nodded and Naruto sent ~ I can live with that!~.

===============end break==============================

Once Naruto walked into the class once more he sat down in his usual spot at the back and waited for his team to be called. Finally hearing his name he sat upright and listened attentively to Iruka. "Uzumaki Naruto, Uchiha Sasuke and Haruno Sakura- Team Seven with Hatake Kakashi as your Sensei. ( Swearing softly at his poor luck, Naruto slouched and waited for the class to end )Team eight..."Iruka rambled.

After twenty minutes of waiting, Iruka finally said " Be here tomorrow at noon to meet your Sensei's. Dismissed." ~ So in Kaen time that would be..two pm. Right?~ Naruto asked mentally and cackled when his father agreed wholeheartedly. /Oi!/ Kaen yelled indignantly at the two, while Kyuubi muttered something about [Childish.]

Grinning away the twelve year old raced home , pausing along the way only long enough to eat at ichiraku's ramen restaraunt for dinner ( laughing mentally when he heard a longing *Ramen!* from his father). Once at home he started sharpening his tools and went through his closet.

[Kit, I'm thinking its time to get rid of the ' Kill me Orange' don't you think?] Kyuubi asked quietly. Nodding in agreement Naruto created four shadow clones ; then designated one to clean his gear , one to find his fathers will, one to get his name changed to Namikaze and one to find the Namikaze Estate. With that done, Naruto walked out of his apartment and towards a Ninja supply shop.

"Sir?" The woman at the counter asked quietly as he perused the clothing. " I would like to buy some new clothes if possible. Preferably a black cargo pant and blue tank or longsleeve. And if possible, could you please put a clan crest on the back of my shirt? " Nodding the woman sorted through her stock until she found the Royal Blue tank and coal colored cargo pants to match.

Standing up she spoke softly saying, " This is what I have sir that matches your description. I have lots of black pants. But I don't have very many blue shirts. " Nodding quietly, the twelve year old shrugged and said " Very well. Could you please tell me what other colours you have in that shirt?"

Relaxing slightly the woman nodded and spoke quietly " We carry blue, black, green, orange, and red. " Thinking quickly, Naruto asked his mental 'companions' what they thought. [ No more orange. ] Kyuubi snarled. Ignoring one of. his enraged counterparts, Minato said *Get blue and black, kit. Three of each shirt and three of the pants as well.*

"Ok, I'll take three of the blue and three of the black tanks. As well as five pairs of black cargo pants. " Naruto ordered the girl who nodded quickly. " Yes sir. Um. You also said something about a clan insignia?" She asked timidly. Nodding the boy handed her the drawing of the Namikaze seal and said " I'd like that on the back of all my shirts please. "

"Very well sir. That will be 75,000 Ryo. Your things will be ready in an hour and a half. "the teen told him quickly. Thanking her, Naruto walked out the door and towards where he had felt a clone dispel before. When he got there he found four ANBU guarding what looked like his father's Will and two Academy students that he knew trying to get it.

Walking up to the ANBU, Naruto inclined his head and said " My apologies, Rabbit. I was trying to finish something when you called." Nodding the ANBU wearing the rabbit mask handed him the scroll, then said " The Hokage also wishes to see you Fox." Thanking the man Naruto turned furious eyes on Kiba Inuzuka and Sasuke Uchiha.

"So..Trying to read documents that aren't yours now are you? What do you have to say about that?" Naruto growled. Kiba, whimpered and muttered how it was Sasuke's whole idea. Sasuke snarled that he should get the scroll because it would make him more powerful and it was his by right anyway.

*Kami help me.. He's Madara all over again!* Minato yelled in Naruto's mindscape. / I have to agree with you there, Sensei. It's kind of creepy. I'm surprised I was so oblivious to it./ Kaen said quietly and guiltily.

[You weren't. You just hoped onto the Sasuke fan train and joyfully followed along. Although I believe the major reason was because the council blackmailed you into it.] Kyuubi said angrily. * What!* Minato asked confused and shocked at the same time.

Ignoring the argument taking place inside his mind, Naruto ground his teeth and stormed up to the Hokage's office getting control of his temper at the same time. Once inside, he dispelled his clone and asked " Old man, you wanted to see me?" while sitting down. " Ah, yes Naruto. But perhaps you could knock first, Hm?" Sandaime said amused, as he waved his hand around the room showing Naruto that he was indeed in a meeting.

Looking up for the first time, Naruto noticed that he was surrounded by Jounin and chuckled nervously. " Um..oops" he said while looking at the Hokage who was grinning away. " Well, you can't say you have never been late to a meeting now can you? " the Hokage asked him. " What? It's not like I try to do these things! They just randomly happen!" Naruto said indignantly , while pouting.

" Sorry..Naruto is it? " A bearded Jounin asked him and recieved a nod in return, "What do you mean exactly, when you say that they 'just. Happen' ?" Chuckling Naruto smirked and said " Well, technically I try to get into some of the situations I have been in. Whichever one of you is my Jounin Sensei will see that. Other time.. Well, lets just say I have a knack for finding trouble."

Ten minutes later they were gone , Naruto had sent a clone off for his new clothes and was happily sitting in the chair across from Sandaime. " Ok, Jiji What is it?" He asked quietly. "I am officially giving you the key to Namikaze Estate, along with his gear and clothes which are probably at the Estate already. You have his Will, and here is a map of the town . " the Hokage handed him everything he needed.

Smiling sadly at the man he considered his grandfather, Naruto gladly placed them in his pockets and said " Thank you Hokage-sama." Nodding the man smiled at his adopted son's child and said " Also, I have had your name legally changed to Naruto Uzumaki Namikaze. You may go by whichever name you wish to use. " Grinning brightly Naruto hugged Sarutobi and then sat back down.

Suddenly right before they were about to discuss the last issue , a young boy dressed in a tshirt and pants with a scarf around his neck ran in screaming " Grandpa! I'm going to .." Halfway through his rant he fell flat on his face due to a very long scarf trailing behind him. Rolling his eyes, the Namikaze heir ignored shouts of " Hey! You tripped me!" for his attention until the boy's trainer ran in and saw him.

"Ebisu- Sensei! That blond boy tripped me! Me , the Hokage's grandson!" Midget as Naruto had taken to calling him shrieked. Glancing tiredly at the Hokage, he saw that the man was furious and that there was and explosion coming. [3..]Kyuubi snickered at the scene. / 2.. Oh dear.. He's starting to change color./ Kaen remarked about the Hokage. *1.. And boom!* Minato shouted gleefully, wanting to watch the Midget get yelled at.

"KONOHAMORU SARUTOBI, WHAT HAVE I TOLD YOU ABOUT RUNNING IN THE HALLS, LIEING TO ME, OR USING YOUR NAME OR RELATION TO ME TO GET HIGHER IN LIFE ? YOU ARE NOT GOD!YOU DO NOT RULE THE WORLD, AND ARE NOT THE MOST IMPORTANT PERSON HERE. ..." Sandaime continued to shout Not caring if the whole village heard or not.

"...LIFE DOES NOT REVOLVE AROUND YOU!..." The Hokage's voice echoed warily throughout the village making everyone look up.

At Ichiraku's, Kakashi Hatake glanced up from his bowl of Miso Ramen and shook his head in amusement.

Over at training ground seven Asuma Sarutobi raised an eyebrow and said " Hm.. Wonder who dad is screaming at today?" He was soon answered when all of a sudden a new torrent of yelling broke through. This time however, it was a child. Pausing in his walk for a moment Asuma heard "...THAT'S STUPID. AND IT'S TRUE, BLONDIE DID TRIP ME NOT MY SCARF LIKE HE SAYS IT WAS. "

"Oh, dear. " the Jounin said and ran towards Hokage tower. Using a Shunshin to get inside his father's office he appeared just as Konohamoru pulled a Kunai on Naruto. Stepping between the two, he raised an eyebrow at his nephew and said " Put it down , Konohamoru. " A throat clearing from behind him, made him turn around to see Naruto with a cut on his wrist.

Swallowing the five year old, dropped his Kunai and said " I'm sorry! " Then he ran out the door and back to his room. Turning to Naruto, the Jounin smiled and said " Sorry about that. " Nodding , Naruto smiled at the other Hokage heir and said " It's fine. Although he needs to learn that he can't use his name for everything and that power is not everything."

Inclining his head in acceptance Asuma walked out of the room, followed by Naruto Usumaki : now known as Naruto Namikaze.


	2. Chapter 2

Apologies people! Naruto does not belong to me! The only characters I own are the names that look unfamiliar to the original Naruto. Ok? ( Note: I will keep an updated list of current characters. Including mine!)

[ Kyuubi talking

/ Kaen talking ( originally future Kakashi but confused Naruto, so they changed his name)

~ Naruto mental speech

* Minato talking

$ Shinigami talking ( opening scene)

" Normal

" SCREAMING OR YELLING

The next morning Naruto hopped out of bed at five in the morning ready to meet Kakashi again. *Naruto. Why are you up at this godforsaken hour?* Minato asked, grumpily as his son plowed through his second cup of Ramen.

~ I'm excited. I've decided that there are a few things I want to change this time around. ~ the blond hyperactively said as he got ready. [ Kit, you don't have to be the for another four hours. Why don't you go find the Namikaze Estate?] Kyuubi spoke reprimandingly to her adopted son as he jumped up and down in excitement .

Thinking it over quickly the twelve year old nodded and said ~ Ok. Dad, can you help?~ Chuckling slightly Minato shook his head mentally and said * Sorry, Naru. But that is part of the fun- you have to find the Estate to get into it.*

Groaning, Naruto created five quick Kage Bunshins and ordered them to look for seals that looked like fuiinjuitsu used by the Namikaze clan. Nodding quickly the five Naruto's spread out , soon followed by the real one who searched the side near the Hokage monument.

Finally it seemed one of his clones had decided it was not in town and walked over the other side of the Hokage monument. Dispelling itself , the clone reported that all the Hokage clan Estates were on the other side were it was safer.

Slapping himself on the forehead, Naruto cursed softly and forgetting to dispell the rest of his clones he ran up the mountain and over to the Hokage estates.

Smiling slightly Naruto walked down the other side and took his key out, as he neared the Estate. Once at the door, he unlocked the Front Gate and started a sweep of the Manor.

~ Dad is this..~ Naruto asked choking on the rest of his words, as his eyes became wet. * Yes son. This is where you should have grown up. Namikaze Estate.* Minato sighed as his son toured the disused manor .

Finally they came upon a photo album and Naruto, curious as ever opened it up cautiously . The first pictures were relatively harmless as they were about Kakashi and Minato himself. But when they got to the middle of the book Naruto dropped it like it had the plague.

"~ Mother..~" he whispered mentally and vocally, shocked. Staring at the picture he could see what Minato had liked about her. The name on the back of the picture said 'Kushina Uzumaki' and she was beautiful.

Standing at 5'10 with stunning sea blue eyes, brilliant dark red hair and a cheerful smile - everything about her seemed to say mishievious.. Yet there was an edge to her that screamed " IF YOU PISS ME OFF,YOUR GOING TO GET IT!"

~ Dad? What happened to Mom?~ Naruto asked quietly. There was a sigh and then * She died in childbirth due to complications. I am unsure what they were so you will have to ask the Sandaime* Minato told him with a flat voice.

Standing up again, Naruto replaced the album and walked back to the Front Gate. Walking out he was surprised to see His clones that he had dispatched earlier had arrived with his clothes, Minato's Will , his weapons , Scrolls and legal papers waiting for him. " Any trouble?" Naruto asked quickly as he took all the items , walking back inside to stash them in his father's bedroom.

" No sir!" they all shouted in perfect unison. Nodding he quickly dispelled all but one and said " Catalogue everything you find in here and on the property. I want to know what items are here, how useful they are, if they have ever been moved ect. Ok?" Nodding the clone quickly got to work and Naruto used a Shunshin to get to the academy school grounds.

Once inside the classroom, Naruto was going to sit at the back of the class when he saw that sadly there were tags on each desk for Teams. Uchiha's desk sadly held a '7', so Naruto moved to the wall near his team.

It wasn't until Sakura and Ino came in shrieking " NO, IM GOING TO SIT WITH SASU-...NARUTO! YOUR NOT WEARING ORANGE!" did anyone actually notice his clothing change and clan Insignia.

Shocked but knowing what would happen if they did not follow clan rules, Shikimaru, Chouji, Kiba, and all the other Shinobi clans ( except Sasuke ) stood to bow to the Yondaime heir. Shikimaru bowed his head again , after doing so the first time and said quietly " Congratulations on your inheritance, Namikaze- san."

Sakura being very confused and annoyed at not being the center of attention shrieked "WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON?" Wincing at her volume and tone, Naruto frowned then said " Not everything is for you to know Haruno. "

Then he turned to Sasuke and said " Uchiha , you are on the very edge of my patience. I know you have a desire for power, but power is not everything nor is revenge. Killing your brother will only give you temporary relief. Then what will you do? You will become a power hungry sociopath, killing everything without mercy or care. Think on it for awhile."

Suddenly a knock on the door alerted them of the Jounin's prescence and all the Genin ( except Naruto ) sat with their respective teams. When it opened a group of five came in and asked for teams one to five. Before they left however, all the Jounin turned to Naruto and bowed their heads in respect. Nodding to them, smiled slightly and dismissed them to their teams.

Half an hour later, Team leaders 6,8,9 and 10 arrived. Noticing first Naruto's clan insignia, all Jounin bowed their heads acknowledging the heir to the Yondaime. Although, Asuma Sarutobi's head was slightly higher as he was the current Hokage's son.

Nodding to them again in both dismissal and acknowledgement ( Sarutobi in particular), Naruto watched as the teams were led out so that his team was the only one left in the classroom.

Sighing he closed his eyes and tuned out Sakura's shrieks , as he napped against the wall.

Two and a half hours later he stood up, suddenly alert as he felt a brush of chakra outside the door. Wondering if the other two felt anything , Naruto kept quiet and watched them. Finally after another ten minutes and Sakura shrieking "HE'S LATE!", the blond Gennin sighed and called out " You can come in, Kakashi- Sensei. I know your there. "

As if on cue, a tall silver haired Jounin walked into the room and said " Hmm. First impressions.. I like the blondie, but I hate the other two. "He paused , gave them an eye smile then said " Meet me on the roof." With those words their Sensei vanished in a puff of smoke, leaving two confused and one very amused Gennin.

Once on the roof, the three Gennin sat across from their Sensei and waited for instructions. " Ok, today is introduction day. As you know I am your new sensei ( *No duh.* Minato sarcastically chimed in) so first thing on the list is introductions. Ladies first." He said , gesturing to Sakura.

Frowning she said " Sensei, what do you mean? Can you give us an example?"Sighing at his strange student, he said " Ok. My name is Kakashi Hatake. I have many likes and many dislikes ( / I especially like Icha Icha!/ Kaen jumped in ), none of which you need to know. Hobbies of mine.. Hmm.. Those are classified.( ~ No there not!~ Naruto yelled mentally) Get it?"

Nodding Sakura, smiled and started off by saying " My name is Sakura Haruno and I come from a civilian family. I like ( here she glanced at Sasuke, who ignored her).. There are only two things I dislike :Naruto and Ino! My dream is ( glanced at Sasuke again).."

' Oh dear Kami, she's a fan girl! ' Kakashi thought in disgust before he gestured to Naruto to begin. "My name is Naruto Namikaze, and I like Ramen , training and missions. I dislike idiots and fan girls. As well as people who can't think for themselves. My hobbies are none of your business and my dream is to become Hokage like my father. " Naruto spoke coolly and challengingly , meeting Kakashi's eye.

Swallowing slightly, the Jounin Sensei bowed his head in acceptance of Naruto's new rank then turned to Sasuke. " I am Sasuke Uchiha , and I do not believe a word that the dead last has said. I do not have many likes nor do I have many dislikes. My hobby is training to be a shinobi and my dream is to restore my clan. "Sasuke told their Sensei , not realizing he was treading a very fine line with Naruto.

"Very well. Now, tell me two strengths and one weakness, you have. For example, one of my strengths is my ability to copy ninjutsu enemy ninja may use with the sharingan I have. My weakness however, is that if I use it too much I am overwhelmed by chakra exhaustion. " Kakashi said quietly.

Thinking it over, the three nodded and Naruto raised his hand voluntarily. Nodding to the boy to start , Kakashi listened quietly as he listed off his strengths and weakness's. " I may have more then one weakness, Sensei . But personally I think my strengths are ninjutsu and clones. My weakness's are taijutsu and genjutsu. "

Thinking it over, Kakashi nodded and said " Yes, your father was always a distance fighter as well which may attribute to why you can't fight close range very well. " Turning to the other two, Kakashi asked" Well?"

"Um, well my strengths are genjutsu and taijutsu. I guess my weakness is my loud voice." Sakura looked down shamefully . " It's fine Sakura, we will work on volume control. " Kakashi said softly to the Kunoichi .

Finally he turned to Sasuke, who said " Taijuitsu and Ninjutsu are my strong points. my pride would be my weak point." Nodding again, Kakashi looked them over and said " Ok, so a genjutsu expert, a taijutsu expert and a ninjutsu expert. Does anyone have any bloodline traits except for Sasuke?"

Nodding, Naruto quickly explained that the Namikaze family had one but had no idea what it was called. "Ok, Naruto. Thank you for letting me know, and try to find out ok. Also meet tomorrow at training field seven , at 6 AM. And don't eat breakfast." Kakashi said the last part a little sadistically.


End file.
